I see one way to solve this:
1- move to dubai and get either company or cheaper and easier freelancer visa to establish tax residency of uae
2- apply with private crypto banks; sygnum, amina bank, swissquote (all of them have local branches in uae)
Deposit there with crypto and they give you...
It is commonly known anywhere in the world
If you have a business and you want to trade with company funds. You need trading license
So to trade. Use personal account and personal money . No license required.
I have a feeling that you will waste time looking for other banana jurisdictions with no real bank account and later come back to Dubai.
As others suggested: find better accountant.
Go meet 5-10 accounting firms at their office and you will figure it out.
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